Just what I needed.
This is just what I needed. My fiancé decided to call off our engagement and end our two and a half year relationship. It had happened so suddenly. I had only been a way from them for a week. Literally, in that one week we had been declaring how much we missed and loved each other over video calls. And within the following week… or perhaps it was more like within three or four days after, they called it off. They took me off of all their socials and blocked my email and number… I was left without any closure. When I went to see them in person, they acted so cold and detached. As if we were never in a relationship. What I found out was that during the time I had been gone, they took an interest in someone else… As I said, this happened so fast for me. I’m not originally from California; however, I came here to be with them and to find better opportunities. They were my only connection here. I would have ended up with no place to stay of it weren’t for their family, who had compassion and sympathy for me. I felt I was just starting to accept and release them. God has a sense of humour… something transpired. My ex-fiancé and I are now sharing a room and at times it’s awkward. Especially when they’re being giddy over the phone with their new interest. So, I’m feeling it extra hard. And I mean torn between wanting to release and wanting to hold on to hope.
And at times, I feel as though I get mixed signals from them. They’ll be friendly and ask if I want to go out with them to the store or just for a ride. And then they’re back to adamantly saying they’ve moved on… I feel I had been a bit petty to point out and say, “that if this other person loves you so much, then why are they not here with you or you with them? And why are you coming to me asking me to massage you?” I wanted to shake them and yell that, “I’m the one who loves you and I’m the one who is here beside you right now.” Yet, i know it wouldn’t do any good. I can’t force them to love me again or to see or acknowledge that much…
And again, this session is just what I needed. And I intend to listen to it whenever I need a reminder and I feel that I’m missing them. As much as I am saddened by our break up and how it all happened. At the same time, perhaps it was for the best. We’re both struggling at the moment and perhaps we both have some more growing and learning to do. Perhaps it was just not the right time for us. The connection I feel towards them is strong. They’re my soulmate. And I do have a sense they are my twin flame. However, as I said, perhaps it just wasn’t going to work with how things were at the time. I don’t know if it ever will. This session reminded me and it had been really great for it to point out in seeing the relationship for what it really was.
I felt I had been over-giving. Things felt really unbalanced in areas. And looking back, we may have had more downs than ups… anyway, I definitely needed this.😮💨