3 min

Unlocking Our Fear Based Beliefs

3 Min
Life Coaching
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Happiness Insight
Clinical Psychologists Wellbeing Experts
In order to move beyond fear and self-doubt, we need to unlock the beliefs that keep us stuck within our comfort zones. Learn how to move into the possibility of your life.
From the community
108 reflections
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Eddie
Fear-based beliefs
I must consider what evidence exists from the past that I will fill. Then I must consider what evidence exists from the pass and I will succeed. Then I have to ask myself what is the worst thing that can happen? Then start to think about what struggles I face my own life. Then truly dive into a certain time of one I have had to draw on my own strength and resilience to get through it
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Lexa
How will you feel??
I think this was very helpful. I liked the part about the presentation bc I can relate to that. I realized I don’t screw everything up that I think I do.
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Jenny
Unlocking my fear based beliefs:
I liked the podcast or session because it gave me straightforward answers that I can apply. 1. What makes the statement true? 2. What makes the statement false? 3. What’s the worst thing that could happen? 4. What has already happened in your life where chaos or problems have ensued? What can you take from those & apply to this? “Fear only exists in the mind.” ~ Dale Carnegie 🙌🏻 So much of my fear is in my mind & keeping a journal or a mental picture of these questions seem really helpful to ask myself each time, because truthfully, I believe it will be an easier way to tell myself to stop, drop and shut it! Stop talking to myself this way. It’s not healthy, as they are always unreasonable beliefs and/or statements I’ve been telling myself for quite some time. I could have a therapist give me that brief of an explanation every time... & finally start my road to freedom! 🙌🏻
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Apple
Fear based beliefs
I feel hopeful that I will gradually overcome my fears. If I instill this learning into my mind, I may convince myself, develop confidence, remove self doubt, and take risks.
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yerissa
school
when ever i go back to school after a long break i tend to have a lot of anxiety . listening to this helped me relaxed & see that whatever is holding me back, can’t really hold me back .
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Carly
Motivated
This motivated me to get out there and experience things. I don’t want the fear of failure to hold me back in life
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Roxanne
Fear does not exist
Although fear comes to my mind and causes procrastination and dread, I realize that I have always survived through it. Knowing that my mind creates fear tells me I can also create peace.
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Beth
Unlocking Fear Based Beliefs
I need to stop letting fear hold me back. I need to trust myself and move outside of my comfort zone so that positive change can take root in myself & my life. I can handle it and I will be okay. Moving outside of my comfort zone will allow me to grow and bring good things into my life. I will not fail because even things that seem to be failures happen for a reason. These things are also meant to be a part of the learning and growing process. This does not mean I do not have to have boundaries in my life. There is a difference and I will still stand up for myself. I will protect myself when moving outside of my comfort zone.
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Nora
Yes
This made me feel capable and it shut down some of my fears
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Maria
Fear based beliefs
When I was in therapy a few years ago, my therapist asked me to consider the same questions, when my anxiety was at its worst. Looking back on all of the obstacles I have overcome, I know I will in one way or another handle my current and future obstacles. I hope I handle these situations with self-compassion and a deeply rooted belief that I am more than capable of thriving during difficult, uncertain times.
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Keira
I learned to look for evidence to support or disprove how I am feeling
I have lots of positive experiences and outcomes to support me
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Adrienne
Move on
We can always draw on our past experiences and use the strengths that we have developed. We will always be able to move forward no matter how hard it seems.
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Grace
What I learned
I’ve heard stuff like this before but it’s good to hear it again. I learned that I should look at the evidence before I say that I can’t do something.
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Teona
Grateful
I am learning more about myself each day as I become more in tune with my inner self.
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Ashley
Feelings
I need to not be so pessimistic towards something that life is giving me. Since when were things we loved easy to get?
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Avery
This was amazing
I learned that if I can’t pick myself up after being knocked down who will because I am the only one who can do what’s right for myself!
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Juliedi
Fear
I learned that fear is only in your head. You can get through any challenge as long as you put your mind to it.
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C
Paradox
Being asked to reflect on "Whats the worst that could happen?" Was actually counterproductive for me; but this made me realize that that question is an internal trigger for me too.
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Auhdra
Happiness
I feel the best I’ve felt in weeks.. I tend to be very hard on myself, I’m always telling myself “you’ll fail” or “No don’t, your not good enough.” But I’ve learned from this little 4 minute video, all this fear is in my head. I can do great things if I let myself.
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Constance
learned
I did learn from this .. where’s the evidence that I’m gonna mess up and etc? it’s no where.. bc there really is no evidence. so why sit there and think that I will?
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Katy
Fear is only in the mind
I learned that taking time to remember the ways in life that I have succeeded, as well as visualizing “worst case scenarios,” helps me ease my fears.
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Cyndi
Fears
There is nothing I can't achieve and all that making second guess myself is all in my mind.
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Valeria
Test & Friendship
I now more confident to facing my fear of my Regents coming up. And less scared on what is going to come out of a my friendship that been on edge.
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Leo
Doubts from failures
I feel a bit relieved knowing that I cannot approach the future with the fears of my past failures. I have to believe in myself that am not what happened to me in the past.
K
~Kate~
I Got This
Nobody knows the future, and life rarely goes as planned. Even a future that’s different than what I hoped for is still a good future and still worth looking forward to. If I can let go of my fear and disappointment, then neither can hurt me anymore.
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Joyce
Fear only exists in the mind...
And the magic of our lives only happens outside our comfort zone. Good intention for today- how am I stretching myself today? What am I afraid of? Namaste
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Justine
Dry mouthed, heart pounding emotion
I sit here in my balcony listening to the distant waves pounding the beach, the occasional bird call, the cat weaving his way through my legs and I contemplate fear. Mostly I shiver in the cold night air, the moon shining her silvered halo upon me, such a soothing silence, a calming night. My hot breath curls and twists made visible in the cool air, fear an emotion of shock and horror, unexpectedness whether brought on by thrusting oneself into situations of danger or finding it thrust upon you. Learn from it and growth, become more from it and learn that fear can hold you back or free you.
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Fia
Amen
Still sad though. But everything was true. And I know it. I’m just too afraid. I need to loosen up.
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Sofia
Fear!
Fear is false evidence appearing real! It’s so true there isn’t evidence of me screwing up so bad like how I think I would. And the worst that can happen is nothing compared to the exponential growth I would experience by moving outside of my comfort zone!
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Becca
I am afraid of things, and that’s ok but I also need to work to move past them
“Fear only exists in our minds” I can move past things. It may take time and I can accept that
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Kate
My own imagination
I had a troubling dream last night that scared me even after I was awake. This was an important reminder that the only thing that I was afraid of was myself.
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Tony
Tools
It’s useful to have tools to help manage feelings of anxiety. I particularly like the evidence based arguments to help bring some cognitive relief to a situation.
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Erika
New beliefs
I learned that it’s important to look at the evidence to see if our fear belief has truth to it..usually it doesn’t..and to learn to believe that whatever difficulties arise i’ll b able to handle it 🙏🏾
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Ronnie
Fear
I understand now that fear is just an emotion that is there to confuse us. It is an over reaction most of the time. Sometimes it protects us from danger but more than likely it’s the wall standing between us and the best things in life.
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Anita
I felt invigorated and calm.
I learned that I can overcome fear by thinking it thru properly. Most importantly, remembering what I’ve already gone thru and accomplished to bolster myself. Key pt >> Fear does not exist, except in my mind.
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Matt
Procrastinating
My label is similar to tug or war or a debate between politicians lol without going into details one time I literally was walking from the parking lot to go somewhere and then turned around and started walking back to my car then turned back around to walk towards where I was going and then back towards walking to my car and finally because someone talked to me I finally ended up going where I needed to be
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Debbie
Mindfulness within the stress
Days like today usually roll over me like a tidal wave, overwhelming and crushing. This day was different. I found moments where I could breathe and find peace in the midst of it all. Whew, it makes such a difference!
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Jen
Feeling stronger
I learned that fear only exists in my mind. I can fight it off by looking at evidence from my past experiences. I feel stronger than before because I have already been through so much and made it through. There is no reason I can’t do it again.
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Stacey
Ready
I’m ready to go back to work and I can handle this. I wrote all the questions down on post it notes to put on the mirror.
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Giovany
Overcoming fear
I learned that a lot of the doubt I have in my head is all just fear and realizing all of this after the hearing this audio has helped a lot. There is no evidence that I won’t adjust to a new job and there is more evidence that I will do well than I thought. Very insightful.
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Sophie
Day 4
I leant that there is not any evidence that you will fail and there is a lot of evidence that you will succeed!
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Doug
Get rid of your negative stories
We all tell ourselves stories about ourselves. I often tell myself that I am shy, fearful, and anxious. I have started to believe this because I’ve been telling myself that for so long. However, I can start to tell myself positive things about myself, and look for evidence to support that positive belief. A positive self image can go such a long way, and it’s still all just an image of one’s self in the MIND. Start telling and believing positive stories about who you are, and look for evidence to support these stories
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Sarah
You’ll handle it
Such an encouraging session! In times of hardship and fear, it’s important to give yourself grace. Yes, you may be struggling. But you are still alive and have made it to the present moment. You’ve made it and will continue to make it.
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Lucinda
All I can do
I learned that all I can do is try. The only thing stopping me from doing anything is me, I need to stop stressing over everything fearing everything. I’m the only one standing in my own way.
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Dave
Hello this is a test
Tension is relieved. Too short really? I have a look at the moment and I will be able to get a meal in the Pump Rooms are available in the UK and Ireland destinations only a few days ago by the way to get the same tickets for the first time buyers to the day we have a look at the moment I don't have the opportunity to work.
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Alessa
Fourth session
I learned that our fears and being hesitant is developed through our mind. Mind over matter you can do anything you want if you put your mind to it!
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Kimberly
Day 7
This was good to listen to. Especially if you are scared of outcome. Like she said: you don’t know if there is no evidence
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Lucy
From this session
I felt more reassured that my fears are only in my mind and that I can get over any obstacles life gives me.
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Sam
Its all in the mind
This made me realise that the fear of anything can stop everything yet we can wipe away that fear in our minds! Lets not fear anything in life and live like we want!
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Vanessa
Whatever happens, you’ll handle it.
This was a great reminder that often there is no tangible evidence that what we are worried about is actually going to happen. I often put off doing things because I’m scared I won’t be able to do it and then I’ll ruin the experience for everyone. For example, going out to a show today with my family. What if I can’t stick it out and want to leave? However, where’s the evidence that I won’t be able to do it? There is no evidence. In fact, there’s evidence to show I can do it because I’ve been there before and had no issues. It’s all about changing our way of thinking. Easier said than done but I’m going to try and take this on board today so I can enjoy a day out with my family.
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Toquyen
Evidence is Key
This was really great because it served as a reminder (a very important one) that you seldom find enough evidence that proves your fear based beliefs. No matter what, you’ll eventually be able to handle a situation if something does go a little wrong. You’ve handled things before, you can do it again.
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Alma
You wear your beauty
I love it when she said that, it just remind me not to put a face on or to change my appearance just to feel more justified by my standard of beauty but to wear what has been inside me and that will make me be the better me.
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Kadence
Thankyou!
I really got a lot from when she told us to wonder what the reasoning was for all the “what if”s. I always question, what if something happens, what if I do this, what if? But I’ve never thought about the reasoning behind the what if’s, since normally, there isn’t any. Thankyou! This really helped!
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Tiffany
Fear
Fear exists only in the mind. Funny how when I was realized what I really want and was honest about it, the fear has started to dissipate. It’s still somewhat there, but I’m human, there will always be a little fear there. I have to trust in myself and trust the process. I have to trust the Universe. I have to think positive and be positive. Everything will work out as it’s supposed to. I love this chaotic life of mine!!
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Sydney
Odd
I learned that while scanning my life for proud moments I only really found two moments worth being proud of and j also felt corrected I guess because I cannot think of a time where my failure didn’t help me or when my own self fought truly stood in the way I just power through I suppose .
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Janae
With Struggle Comes Success
I learned that my greatest accomplishment came from my greatest struggle in life. But during that struggle I didn’t focus on the fear of the bad , I focused on the future and what was to come. It was hard, but needless to say I made it through. Maybe I should take that same strength and apply it to other shattered areas of my life. Food for thought.
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Matthew
Not much to fear in life any longer!
I've never really been ”scared” of performing, speaking in front of others, or interviewing for jobs or with clients. I could have never been a youth leader or teacher if I had. I couldn't have been in business for myself for so many years without being able to openly and confidently converse with strangers, convincing them to become my clients. The only thing I fear now is another massive stroke! I don't ever want to repeat that experience! It frankly terrifies me!
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Ciara
Helps
This helps me feel calm & relaxed before bed when thoughts usually rush through my mind.
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Natalie
Fear is natural but usually based in little truth.
Examine your fears and see that there is usually little evidence to support your fears. Ask yourself, “what are some things that could go wrong and how would I handle them?” Know that in most situations, you will make it through as you have in difficult situations in the past
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Alexander
Fear exist in the mind
everything starts in the mind. our thoughts and beliefs. im reminded of my negative thoughts. and right now ive decided to start facing them slowly, build courage to unlock my negative thoughts. it is really difficult in real life, but with enough practice i think i can do it now, we can and we will
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Charlotte
Truth
I learned that not everyone cares as much as I do about the things I care about. They have their own agenda, beliefs, ethics. I've learned that in order to be happier its crucial I care less about those trivial things.
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Tiffany
Fear ladders
I start by walking through the easiest fear. I learn how to calm and soothe myself. I keep progressing through the rungs of the ladder until I have conquered my most severe fear. Trough these experiences my anxiety reduces. Where could you start? What is your most severe fear? I started by asking for what I need. My most severe fear is snakes.
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Cam
Day 2 continued.
Fear is always going to poke and prod. The evidence to combat fear is just as available, and it is my choice to fear or use my courage. Yes, some days I’m afraid she will find someone better. That I won’t fit in my career. That I won’t be the person I envisioned. But no one is saying that except for myself. I’m human, it happens. But it’s quite silly to reflect on. Sending love
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Cyndee
The interview...
I may be going for a job interview in the near future and I started to feel a little anxiety about it. My anxiety is based mostly on the fact that working two jobs is difficult and I started running through all the what if‘s in my mind. Like what if I get sick and have to call of at both my jobs. What if I’m so tired and fatigue that my job performance suffers and I get in trouble at both my jobs and worst of all what if I had insomnia and have to pull a double! Listening to this advise reminded me that everything will probably go just fine. I shouldn’t worry about something that might happen in the future bc whatever does happen I will just deal with it then. As far is the interview, I haven’t had to go through that and such a long time, but I am applying for a job in the same field and I know what my feelings are about it so I should be able to express them and if I get a little nervous and mess up it’s only bc I really want that job. Thanks Aura 🌞
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Carolina
Reminder
Sometimes we need to remember ourselves to calm down and open our eyes,remembering who we really are and why we are here. We are love and we are loved.
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Lauren
Overcoming Fears
Today, I found from the moment I woke up, I was feeling a tad bit upset. Now, being home from school where I’m not surrounded by those who will judge, I have found myself crying my eyes out. I am not okay, as things have been looking down lately, and there are certain things I do not understand. This meditation in particular was one of which I could really relate to. Although I’m still left here crying, I realize that there are things I need to get out of my system to a specific someone that plays a very important role in my life. This is something I now realize that I cannot leave unspoken. Thanks again.
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jess♥️
Love
I learnt that being love is when you are accepting, kind, honest and appreciative. If we want to be love, we have to show that we are these things, and that we are different and unique. We have to do things that we know right even when people may try to hold us back and/or bring us down.
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Jack
Self Hug
I learned that a couple of minutes meditation can be very worthwhile.
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maria
owen
we could work out.. if he put a little more effort into our relationship
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Armando
attention
i noticed that with the i feel great it was harder to stay focused.. why does it feel when i pick more sad or anxious emotions i can focus more?
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Sharmain
So true!
It’s true, everything that she said. I just wish she could’ve spoken a bit slower as there are a lot of good information to take in in less time. Nonetheless, very helpful and systematic.
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Zephania
passion
I had lost my pasdion. And now I feel my dreams... That am still as fresh as when I was a little boy. I must achoeve my dream.
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Karstan
I felt very relaxed while listening
I learned that I need to change how I think sometimes and that I need to be more encouraging to my self
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Vincent
Such an inspiration
The questions what is the worst thing that can happen really is helpfull in life. I used to worry about stuff which l won’t do anymore. Also the mindset ‘will it bother me in 2 months’ can help :)
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Tawn
fear
I learned how to break down my anxiety, define the fear that drives it and self-heal
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Em
Remember
Evidence. Good and bad What’s the worst outcome How to handle that Look at everything you’ve gotten through already
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Kim
Fear
I learned that the fear in myself is there sometimes cause I’m holding myself back I need to let go of that fear give it God and let go. I just need to take a few deep breaths and relax my mind think positive things.
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Patrick
FEAR
False Evidence Appearing Real Perhaps, it is true, that Fear exists only in the Mind. 🙏🙏🙏❤️❤️❤️
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Devereaux
Fear
What is the evidence? This is something that can be applied to almost every doubt i may have! I liked this session!
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Angela
Epic fail
With a plan to run several errands today, I ended up not being able to leave the house without having a major panic attack. One step closer to becoming an agoraphobic? Maybe.....
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Lizzy
A+
I feel that I can talk to Ms. Seidler about whether I can get all my A+ done by the end of the school year.
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Selina
Calming
I was anxious about my first day of school but not anymore. 😊
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Alex
Pertinent
This lesson really resonates for me. Living all the time in fight or flight mode, fearful of what could happen and apprehensive about the future, this lesson reminds me to look at my own history and how I’ve managed in the past. Need to remember those things.
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Mere
Dealing with fear
This was a good exercise. So true. If I ask myself these questions it will unlock the fact that my fears aren’t as bad as I think they are. They are manageable. I wonder if I can find these questions written down?
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Bianca
Calmness
I learned to calm my nerves and noticed I been through worse times and I over fame those times.
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Brooke
Overcoming the fear of an Interview
I understood what was being said in the session... so far I survived everything I have put my mind too, no matter how nervous I was. And yes, what is the worst than cam happen? Maybe it’ll be a bit uncomfortable, maybe I won’t get the position? But there will be others... I am still feeling completely unprepared for this interview though (and being unprepared means I will fail because I literally don’t have a presentation) and the negative thoughts and racing heart rate are making it impossible to prepare 😞
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Yvie
It helped
At school I was scared I was going to fail my subjects..But now I feel abit better.
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Melissa
Fear
That fear is only in the mind. The evidence shows in my experiences to do well and will continue to do well as long as can put fear aside.
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Patrick
Thank You
Excellent talk. I have written: “Humanity creates complexities where none exist.” This lecture speaks of this idea. The solutions to our fears are quite simple. ❤️☮️🙏
Ka
Kyle archer
Fear
The only thing you fear is fear itself, you will get threw this you’ve already dealt with this and got threw this before
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Saryn
Stronger
I learned that fear doesn't have to cripple me. That I have the power and strength to overcome it.
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Vanessa
Great session exploring what fear really is
The Dale Carnegie quote at the beginning was an excellent introduction. Fear is an idea in our minds that we can give power to or overcome. We don’t have to let it keep us from the things in life we find most fulfilling. The best things in life tend to occur outside of our comfort zones because that is when we are expanding limits, reaching the best parts of ourselves. I found it insightful when the speaker said: think of a situation in your life you haven’t handled. Because it’s true, for the most part, one way or another we get through the challenging things in our lives.
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Marcela
It’s okay not to be okay
Honestly. I don’t think we ever take the time to think about the good things that come out of a bit so good situation. But whatever situation we have been in, we always persevere. Any situation life throws at us we can get through it, not only because we are strong, but Bc we are all here for a reason.
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Erika
Fear could be the sign of a great opportunity
What have you done that was worthwhile or that you are proud of where you didn’t have some fear or doubt? Fear is in the mind and can impact our bodies and cause real responses, but it could also be a sign of an opportunity for growth, an opportunity to learn, to potentially do something I am proud of that will have lasting impact and that I will remember. I will see fear as a sign that something might be an opportunity for growth and going out of my comfort zone, because that is where the magic happens. I will choose courage and build that muscle because I want to learn and grow and try far more than I want to be comfortable.
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McKenzie
Eh
Eh wasn’t what I was looking for the app made me listen to it
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Tori
Mehhh
The ending was really good, but overall wasn’t what I was looking for :/
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Sandra
I liked this
What resonated with me is “what evidence is there to prove your fear?” And so what if you fail? Why don’t you think you can handle it?
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Samantha
The tallest trees are the most resilient.
Through winds, storms, fires, humans, animals, climate change, through time and age.. there are trees that continue to grow and grow no matter what is thrown their way. A fire may burn its limbs, high winds may twist its spine, humans may give it scars, the time may take its bark or its young beauty. Still, somehow it remains. Still, somehow it continues to grow tall. The tree does not feel fear, it just is.
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Caitlin
My 35th birthday
I learned that my husband really loves me. He loves our kids. He wants to make things special. He really is going through a lot getting off his meds. I wish he wouldn’t pick important days as days to drop his dosage, but maybe that’s why he picks those days. I love him so much. I love our kids so much. Sadie has so much energy. Wants to jump around all the time. But who wouldn’t?! I had so much fun on the swings today😁. It was nice being friendly at the park today.
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Dina
I was vulnerable and honest today.
I spoke honestly and openly today and wasn’t judged the way I thought I would be.
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Michelle
Look up/call up past successes
What is the evidence that I will fail? Have I not in the past been successful at things? Yes, people have given me the chance, have trusted me and my experience and have hired me. The more I do, the more in tune I am. The more I do, the more my creativity comes out. The more I do the more my self esteem grows
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Nicoletta
Fear
This short encouraging story was a good reminder of how fear has been impacting my life when it shouldn't. I'm so afraid of losing my friends. Why? Because I've lost so many over the past 4 years. Every new loss is another 'you see, you can't do friendships'. But this fear is exactly what unconsciously pushes new friends away. I get clingy, over supportive, too active in their life's, etc, etc. My fear of loss is actually creating my truth nowadays.
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Carl
Fear
I felt after that i can get through anything as long as i put my mind to it and ignore the fear
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Clarissa
I wasn’t sure this applies to me and where I’m at?
Even though she used a job interview as an example maybe learning to not beat myself up when I’m faced with a situation? Might be the lesson?
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Stavroula
Although my issue didn’t pertain to a job .
I did realize I can look within and find my God given strength .
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Margo
I don’t meditate just to meditate I meditate because I love it
I really love the meditation and meditation helps me relax and stay calm and help me not think about anything that upsets me and I feel like I’m relaxed and calm my mind is shut down and I can breathe and relax and sleep and be at peace and quiet while I sleep and feel god’s presence and I think of the color blue which is such a beautiful thing and helps me relax and stay calm and quiet and that helps me relax and stay calm while I meditate
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Susan
Let go
What am I afraid of? A friend told me that more than 90% of the things we worry about never come true
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Kelly
Disrupting the negative self chatter
This made me realize the need to shine a light on the negative self talk with logic. I really enjoyed this session and the solution it offered to get past fear