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Soften and Allow

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Jiva Masheder
Mindfulness & Self-Compassion Teacher
Life is difficult sometimes....and our usual response to difficulty is to brace against it and try to make it go away. The thing is, when it's our own emotions that are difficult, that just creates more tension. So if we can soften internally and allow ourselves to feel what we're feeling, we reduce that internal conflict.
From the community
37 reflections
I will use this meditation again! I focused my attention on my neck and shoulder muscles which are always typically tight, feeling as if my shoulders are drawn up to my ears. I wasn’t completely convinced of the value of this meditation at the beginning but by the time the meditation got to the “allowing” segment my neck and shoulder muscles completely relaxed and I was rolling my head all over. It felt wonderful! If you are feeling tension in your body you might want to give this a try. 💫
Mind Over Matter
Thank you for this recommendation, Debb! As I have so much stress and pain from my celiac disease, this was really helpful. What I found even more beneficial than any relief felt was facing the realization that my muscles are at war with my illness. Where there is pain, the muscles surrounding the pain tighten in protection but this “protection” merely creates additional pain and discomfort. In actuality, I have never considered that this is what is occurring. But that is exactly what my body is doing. It is intensifying and heightening my level of discomfort. With this new awareness comes the ability to realize that I must simply accept the fact that the pain is present. Rather than fighting it, I can concentrate my efforts on softening all the surrounding muscle and tissue. Once I do this, tension is released and the level of discomfort lessens a bit. I am very grateful for this meditation and what I have gleaned from it. I intend to listen often until I am able to focus my attention properly for the benefit of my health and wellbeing.
Soften is so helpful a busy day
This practice has been so helpful after my day today of cleaning and rearranging my dining room/ sitting room. A needed reminder to sit and soften my tense shoulders, but allow them to stay slightly tense when I can’t release all the tension. It’s not a failure on my part, I didn’t choose it, something happened and that can be okay as well. So many things I need to remember from this session. I am glad for this one.
Internal Struggle
Especially during difficult times, we tend to try to protect ourselves against the stress and the heavy emotions we feel. Unfortunately, doing this can add much more added stress to our mind and body. In this meditation, Jiva helps us by having us repeat the words ‘softening’ and ‘allowing’. Since experiencing an abrupt loss in my life, the tension i feel in my shoulders and neck has caused a great deal of pain. Becoming aware of my breath and tuning into these tense areas of my body, I repeated the word softening. With each out breath, I could feel a small amount of the tension loosen ever so gently. Then I followed Jiva’s direction to become aware of my emotions I am feeling. With each out breath, I repeated the word allowing. Honestly, I almost began to cry. Feeling and ‘just being’ with these emotions is certainly not easy! However, as Jiva says, these emotions are already here. What caused these emotions to be here has already happened. No matter how hard it is, we need to allow ourselves to ‘just be’ with these emotions. The next time I find myself combating this internal struggle, I will remember these words, softening and allowing, to give myself the compassion my body, mind and soul deserve.
It’s okay to allow stressful and anxious feelings to come because it’s in our human nature. Being able to recognize stress is important, as well as relaxing our body once we go into that fight or flight mode.
relaxed and calm mind body and spirit together and in sync
you just need to go inward to heal your body and to find peace and calmness
Soften and allow
I learned that is ok to feel stressed or with anxiety, is ok. We are humans, and every human being can feel these way, the point here is to know how to connect with yourself to feel alright
A moment of peace
During the practice I focused on where my tension was instead of trying to work around it like I do throughout the day. It felt nice to sit with it and not have to worry about pushing through. When the meditation was over I opened my eyes to my house and all the things I gave to do to get through the day. The anxiety and depression are still there but now there’s the extra task of trying to stay soft throughout the day. If only I could sit here forever.
Let it be! It’s okay You’re gonna be okay Don’t be afraid... You didn’t choose any of this, but it’s there; So let it be... Soften... just soften
It’s gonna be okay
I learned that stress will be there but, do not let it take over your mind. Practice softening your thoughts to break free.
I realized I need to stop trying so hard to push out anxiety. I can’t “force” it away, and I need to learn to accept that and to just feel it sometimes. The pressure we feel in our chests won’t last forever!
Another GREAT session for a very trying week. I highly recommend!!
Jiva, yes! Soften, no fighting! Stop, allow yourself time! Thanks.
Walter J
Softening...& Allowing...
Two powerful methods for taking the edge of a stressful situation or for getting ourselves out of the game of life and back in the flow of life. Love the idea, you are already in the situation. Regardless of if you caused it or not, you are in it, so what can you do? Soften & Allow Soften... your thoughts, your words, your deeds. Allow... life to flow on, things to unfold, the lesson to reveal itself. This too shall pass & we will either be here or somewhere else. Soften & Allow May have to become my next mantra... ❤️☮️🍀
Sobering up- T
It is so easy to lose one’s moral compass, sense of propriety, social grace and even control of one’s self due to external circumstances. If or when this happens remember: It is just as easy to return to these noble things. Shame is to an extent deserved, but should not be perpetuated. A moment or night in the past is exactly that- over. Done. Do learn from these experiences, don’t punish yourself! Falter, assess, implement, continue forward.
I can barely contain the tears of my beloved kitty, Molly. She didn't need to pass. And now I'm stu
Wondering I can move beyond this pain. Momma loves your forever my little monkey. Never for get. 💗💕
Will I ever feel complete again?
Pain of losing a child most days seems unbearable. Searching every day for peace and comfort by drawing closer to God. I need to calm my thoughts and find peace in my soul.
I woke up with a lot of tension because I have so much going on and this helped calm me. I can take on this week without stressing.
ERIN Sinclair
Waking up
My body hurts & being sore I feel less stress inside my body
I feel very relaxed and at peace Meditation really works. Thank you
Instant calm
I used this right before a big meeting and instantly felt the stress leave me. Thank you for the reset.
Softening Allpwing
Where I need to be today D had another seizure—very long very difficult scary sad worrisome’s not going away....I need to softened the sharp edges of fear and allow the best of me to care for us —allowing
I am grateful for every new day!
Every day is a new day for learning and allowing myself to soften and let it all into my being without prejudice.
Soften and Allow
Great for muscle cramping and soreness - often much of the pain is gone if we can laser-focus on the concept of softness and relaxation.
Soften and allow
Good morning!This was great way to start off my day along side with a healthy breakfast I hope that everyone else enjoys it! I gave it a 5 star review!!have a good day
Meggan Wilbow
I have complicated grief and anxiety and disassociative disorder ptsd and clinically depressed and add yay. I have had bad double vision blurred vision and a lazy left eye
Stress in stomach
I learned that I put a lot of stress in my stomach. By letting the stress go it’s more comfortable. However, for so long I’ve been putting the stress there to feel thinner and more confident.. now it’s a natural reaction. Need to remind myself to lessen the pressure on my stomach more often.
Jayden Sheppard
It’s okay to feel this way it’ll all be over soon I can’t stress my self out about everything
Life is difficult sometimes
I have realized that I too deserve grace and compassion; just like I always give to others.
First meditation
I learned that I tend to let my mind wander during meditation.
wake up meditation
i felt like the gentle rain sounds helped me stay present in the meditation and really focus on softening like the water. a perfect little recentering
I learned that I am bracing against emotional and physical feelings. Gentle reminder to soften and allow. Thank you
Internal Conflict
I learned that it’s alright to feel internal conflicts and it shows how to deal with it
I noticed
I noticed that during the soften relaxation my entire body just melted away. I was like a calm bed of water.
I can let go of the anxiety about doing meditation the right way- take the pressure of. My mind wandered but I was able to bring it back. No judgement
I did not choose this.
It’s okay, let the tension soften, let it go, be calm. I did not choose to have these symptoms or signs and I can let them go. Writing this on a keyboard is hard - writing in a journal may be easier.
Loose tightness in body
Yes this was helpful with my tight lower tummy muscles. Soften.
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