7 min

Self-Compassion Series: Self-Criticism

7 Min
Emotional Intelligence
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Happiness Insight
Clinical Psychologists Wellbeing Experts
How do you treat yourself when you make a mistake, stumble or trip up? If you're like most of us, you are probably very critical of yourself. In this self-compassion series, we will look at self-compassion and in this session, we'll be exploring the problem with self-criticism.
From the community
4 reflections
It's VERY hard to be kind and compassionate to myself as a certified perfectionist. ”Damnit, Matthew!” is a normal phrase out of my mouth...drives my wife nuts that I'm so down on myself so often. I TRY to be kinder to myself. I fail. Damnit, Matthew! Since my stroke, it’s been SO difficult just surviving the day-to-day! Hasn't left much room for celebrating just being alive and present for my life and family. But I've not given up. Not yet anyway. I've felt like giving up or giving in, but I keep fighting anyway. Not sure I have it in me to give up or give in, frankly!
Self compassion
I have been through a lot within the last year. Trying to make a relationship successful hasn’t been easy. Some days I am confident and happy and the next I am unsure, doubting, scared and upset. In the past I have not chosen the right type of person to love. They have been abusive, controlling and manipulative. This one is different, but it has taken me some time to be sure because of all the pain I have endured in the past. I have made mistakes. I have projected insecurities and distrust. It has been hard. I am a perfectionist and expect better of myself. Plus I feel guilty for impacting the relationship negatively. I would like to be able to give myself more compassion and affection under this circumstance.
It makes no sense
Once, I was asked: All the wonderful things you do for so many; why do you not do so for yourself! Like so many, I grew up in a world of criticism, judgment and physical, emotional and mental pain. There was much anger and hatred. Later on, I was accused of being a perfectionist. Here is what perfectionism is: YOU ARE NOT ALLOWING YOURSELF TO BE A REAL, HUMAN BEING Making mistakes is one way you learn about who you really are. Be Human...enjoy making mistakes…and learn. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Mind Blind
We hold ourselves to such a higher standard that we do anyone else. I didn’t really see the entire picture until now... after listening to this. I’ve been blindly self-criticizing myself. Even now, I am semi-consciously criticizing myself for being so self-critical!