To surrender...
Reminding myself that I am the only one living with my body and that, yes, I have to accept that my usual plan of working first thing in the morning is just not always feasible and not to ruin my morning with unreasonable and unrealistic expectations for myself because I’m still going to rock today because the dishes are my one big thing project and then I’m going to make the best spaghetti recipe I could finally get ingredients for.
And forgiving myself for not being able to put this plan into action for days because different things kept transpiring to say, ‘not today!’
My marbles include this overwhelming sense of failure about the dishes because, of course, it’s a task ENTIRELY reliant upon my ability to simply stand up straight.
I could point out the groceries and their weight, but it’s more the treacherous conditions that the snowstorming being plowed has created.
It was a freaking obstacle course trying to just walk around and get spell energy and then groceries.
I can choose to be excited, instead that there were finally all of my missing ingredients and that I know my spaghetti is going to be phenomenal, especially when it’s so cold out.
I can control reading the instructions so that I boil the noodles properly this time and not overdoing it.
I can control adding the cheese in shifts.
I can control being super careful with chopping up the sausages.
I can control giving myself a clean environment to cook in and enjoying the activity of cooking because I’m learning and I already know how awesome it will taste, so I’m going to celebrate that and do everything I can think of not to become overwhelmed by either emotion, pain, anxiety, depression, exhaustion, crippling mind weeds.
None of these things can be allowed to interfere with my One Big Thing.
