Popular Ideas That Make Sex A Hassle

People say they want sex to be “natural and spontaneous,” a source of pleasure, comfort, and connection. But they then construct sex that’s complicated, frustrating, and anxiety-provoking. They’re afraid of failing because they’ve made sex about success. And they fear they might have or develop a “dysfunction,” because they don't understand how emotions shape sexual function. There is another way to have sex--a way that focuses on relaxation, playfulness, self-acceptance, and communication. I call this approach Sexual Intelligence--and anyone can learn it, use it, and enjoy it.