Taking the Time
Going through the day-to-day of life, we think that we have all the time in the world to say things weโve been wanting to say, do things weโve been wanting to do, and then something happens: Life reminds us that death can come at any time. Finding ourselves filled with regrets, wishing we had just one more moment to say all the things weโve wanted to say to those we love, we feel great sorrow.
Because it happened so unexpectedly, I had an extremely difficult time processing my Kayleighโs departure from this earth. On this one year anniversary, I remember the huge shock, the undeniable pain, the explosive anger, the extreme shame and guilt, as if it were yesterday. You see, the day before, I knew she wasnโt feeling well, but thinking it was minor, I went on with my morning activities. That would prove to be a fatal mistake, as just a mere 24 hours later, her heart stopped beating. Filled with sorrow, I greatly suffered for quite a while, finding myself withdrawing from my loved ones that were right next to me. Knowing that they deserved my attention and love, I promised my girl that I would not neglect their needs as I had hers. I knew the only way to truly heal was to ask for her forgiveness as well as to forgive myself. Through deep reflection, I found the strength and love to do so. Feeling the chains that had taken hold over my heart break, love and wisdom poured in.
It took me not giving my undivided attention to my Kayleigh for me to realize the importance of doing so. Learning the hard way to be mindful, to always give my undivided attention to my loved ones, I took these valuable lessons to heart. No longer taking their presence for granted, I take the time to show them my love and appreciation. I take the time to give gratitude.
There is no denying how much I love and miss you, my beautiful sunshine. I thank you for showing me what is truly important in this life: Taking the time to Give Love, to Receive Love, to Be Love.