3 min

Letting Go Of What You Can’t Control

3 Min
Healthy Mind
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Hannah Castillo
Mental Health Counselor
Understanding the concept of the sphere of control can help you learn to identify which things are truly within your control and learn to accept which things you have no control over.
From the community
17 reflections
E
Erin
Control
I learned a good mental exercise for determine what I can and can’t control. Mental imagery of the spheres helps with classification and direction of effort.
L
Lola
Things I can’t control
I can only take care of things I can control, not another person’s feelings
T
Tracey
Things I can’t control
Very helpful to learn most things are out of my control so why stress about them. I must learn to appreciate this and let the thoughts go especially other people’s thoughts as I have no control over them.
J
James
Letting go of things you can’t control
The Only thing Controlled by You is WHAT YOU SAY and WHAT YOU DO 🙏🏿
R
Rachel
I felt a sense of agreement and relief
I learned that which I already knew and was working on, needing to let go of a false sense of control.
R
Roger
I felt an association
It is a good practice in life to work on this rings I’d like to see more info on this technique
K
Kathy
Control
I learned that I either have complete control, influence, or no control. Once I determine the sphere I’m in, act accordingly.
K
Keith
Realization
being able to recognize and categorize controllables allows for navigating negative uncontrollable stress
K
Kate
Put in perspective!
This refocus and realization was very helpful in reminding myself what is in my control and what isn’t in my control. This strategy/understanding will definitely help in reducing my anxiety and stress.
J
Jkt
Who me m? Do i want to control
Worry and control - I hadn’t put the two together but now I can easily see where one drives the other like a two horse team. I’m giving them free rein in my outer world relationships. Saying the Serenity Prayer / doing a reality check by asking myself these questions is responsible and develops me and I can probably stop sone of the undercurrents of anxiousness.
J
Jose
The circles
Control or influence is where I can put in work Outside of that the ocean of frustration must be let go of.
J
Janna
Letting go of what I can’t control
This reminds me of the serenity prayer to except the things that I cannot change and to understand the things I can change and the wisdom to know the difference! Whenever I let go to the things that I can’t get for all makes much easier to stay mindful about the things that I can’t control and therefore I don’t have to be anxious or worry about things that I don’t have to worry about! It makes for a much simpler day!
J
Jennifer
Control
Concentrating on what I can control rather than what I can't during a sad or hurtful time in my life is something I want to learn. This makes so much sense to me. To me it flows into being respectful of others when they may hurt me or choose a path without me. I'm only in control of myself. I liked your circle analogy. I loved your lesson!
N
Nancy
I noticed that I focus way too much on the outer red ring of things incanot control.
I need to pay more attention to what I CAN control. Try to distance my thoughts from the outer ring. Practice bringing myself back to “center”.
I
Ian
I have come across this concept before but useful to be reminded of it.
I learnt not to unduly worried by things I cannot control but to focus on those I can
S
Sian
Worry.
I learned that worry is a waste of time. Being concerned with things that are simply not in our control is a waste of energy as well. Take that energy and use it to focus on something else!
H
Helene
Great advice
I do try to focus my thoughts on what I can control, but I now realize that I do fret over things that I’m nonlynhave influence over. Thanks for explaining the difference!