7 min

I Love You! Now Please Fix Me!

7 Min
Life Coaching
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Dorothy Zennuriye Juno
Psychotherapist & Meditation Teacher
Do you look to or rely on the love of your partner to help you feel complete, whole, loved, or appreciated? Do disagreements and conflicts become the illumination of your unspoken desires? Do you look to or expect your partner to - by means of loving you - "make you" feel whole, complete, and happy? Join me in this episode of Life Coaching WISDOM for a closer look at what is still an unclaimed secret to feeling wholeness - loved - secure - happy - and how to feel this - NOW - for yourself.
From the community
17 reflections
In need of my own love
I remembered what I had forgotten. I am dragging love out of others hoping they will fill the emptiness in my heart. The idea about how far this begging for love has gone makes me sad. This helped me by reminding the truth about love & equality I’ve been so eager to ignore.
Everybody needs to listen to this. Loving yourself should be one of your biggest priorities.
You don’t really know how to give or receive the love of another without loving yourself
Much of my adult life I’ve wanted someone to make me feel complete. I’ve gone from one relationship to another seeking unconditional love, not realizing that I did not even know how to give that to myself. This was a loving and wonderful reminder of where anyone struggling like me can begin to shift their focus. Thank you for this illuminating lesson.
Aha moment
I have struggled for years with over involving myself with others but, this practice helped me realize that others like me, are responsible for their own happiness. It’s not my job to fix others or expect them to fix me. I wish the questions were written out, I missed them while listening :/
I Love You. I Will Fix Myself.
5 "Secret" Questions to Ask. Don't loop yourself in to hoping anyone but you can truly fix what leaves us seemingly reliant and then *shockingly* disappointed by another person. Ask yourself: 1. What am I feeling in this moment? 2. How do I most want to feel? 3. What do I need? Ask it often and repeatedly. 4. How can I give this need to myself? 5. What would allow me to feel what I want to feel right now? Use these questions to help identify how to become your own source of unconditional love. Don't sit and hope that like a movie, you will experience another who "completes" you. ❤️
Love Thy Self Frist
Look into ur self for the strength and encouragement that will prompt your love for yourself first. Don’t look for others love to feel complete, look first into your heart and soul for the answers. Don’t rely on others to fill the holes that you have not filled yourself.
I Love Myself. Now I Can Fix Myself.
“What do I need to give myself that I am relying on another for?” I rely on my relationships with others to fulfill my inner needs that I believe I can’t fulfill myself. I am wrong. Everything I need is already inside of me, I just need to learn how to harness it. Others loving you will only take you so far on the journey of loving yourself.
I need to give myself what myself needs. No one can give me it better than myself.
I learned that I appreciate my partner and his efforts. I Love me so much 😩❤️
What you need you have to address with you first!
Can I give it to me first? And when another offers how do I accept it? Gratitude. Be grateful 🙏🏾
Relying on Self
I do a lot of “self-care”, but I need, for MYSELF, to spend more intentional time reassuring myself of my love and care for me.
I am lost
I learned that I need to give myself what I need first. My thoughts are all over the place so much so that I don’t know what I need.
Loving oneself is a gift!
I leaned that it’s important to look to myself for the fulfillment of my own needs rather than expecting my relationships to be wholly responsible for meeting those needs. “To love another is a privilege. To love yourself is a necessity”—Dorothy Ratusny
I think what I learned from listening to this is that I need to be aware more of how I feel in That moment and what I need in that moment. I need to see what I can do for myself to meet that need.
I realize I haven’t listened to Omar. He’s screaming for validation, my comfort but I go backwards and say how he’s hurt me in the last. I’m not letting him grow or accepting who he is now. I didn’t think I mattered so much to him. I broke his heart. Leaving the day he came home wasn’t right. I’m going to apologize down the line I have the opportunity. The dust needs to settle first. Lord, let him know I love him. Sooth his heart. To remember good things and forgive me. Put your hand on his heart and forgive my resentment. I’m learning, I’m listening.
I need to learn to love myself
I have learnt from listening to this that I am extremely insecure and these are issues within myself not my relationship I need to try and work on this myself and to stop letting it effect our relationship the way it has been.
So important
Even in the worst of circumstances this applies. If you can remember this and walk it out in a bad circumstance you will come through and be ok and regain you. I needed this reminder this morning. Thank you.
Time alone
I needed this reminder not to rely on the love of my partner for my well being. I am fortunate to have a loving partner and I struggle when we are apart to feel happy on my own. I do love myself but I don’t know how to show myself I do because it’s internal. I think this is something we are not taught how to do. I am thankful for this lesson from Dorothy and I will continue to ponder and practice, by using these questions.
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