I learned the basic principles of self love. It's painful to get negative feedbac from people you care about when you are your true self. That's the hard part for me. Suggestions about changing my hair to how to properly make a recipe. Or how to act. When this has happened, it's someone that is manipulative and finds my calm way of being threatening. They are not in a good place. They are faking it as you mentioned. It's not painful anymore because my instincts guide me to greater things and people. Away from the negative and things that no longer serve me.